Minor Spillage

In every episode of ‘Off Script’, Ben and Lloyd are faced with a tough, but real, acting challenge… To take a script, with absolutely ZERO preparation, and perform it to the best of their abilities. No peeking, no hints, no ideas - just straight into the scene, and being left to (hopefully) swim rather than sink thanks to their considerable talents! In the fifth episode of the series, the boys faced a scene that took them straight into the depths of absurdist comedy, with an extremely daft script by Ryan Croughan. Presented here for your reading pleasure, is the script of “The Haunted Manor”… exactly as the Off Scripters were handed it… EXT: Auderly Manor. Night. A dilapidated manor house stands imposingly on a bleak winters night. RUSSELL (20s) stands outside, freezing. Wrapped in a thick coat, he holds up a phone on a selfie stick. He addresses the phone as it records him on a live stream. RUSSELL Hello there fellow Horror Hunters, welcome to episode 67 of ‘Trust Me - It’s Haunted’ a...

Isn’t it marvellous when a long-term dream collides with the chance to do something good for society?  My dream for the past couple of years has been to traverse the island of Great Britain end to end without touching the ground. How will I do this? The answer is in plain sight, sweeping over our farmland, stretching across our highways. Yes, folks, I’m going to do the nation’s first ever sponsored pylon walk. I’ve spent the past five months training to be an expert tightrope walker, and I’ll wear a unique wetsuit made from a combination of various non-conductors of electricity, including rubber, plastic, and shards of glass, to keep those pesky shocks at bay. I had planned to walk from Dungeness on the south coast up to Durness at the top of Scotland, but then I was struck by a brainwave. End to end could also mean side to side, right? So instead, I’ll be pylon walking from Morecambe to Scarborough, with that prevailing coastal wind giving me that extra push. Naturally, I’ve heard...